For The Cause
by ArcticCircle
Summary: Sophie never knew real fear of the titans, she grew up in the safety of Wall Rose and was sheltered from the horror that met those living in Wall Maria. With her older sister leaving for the military, against her father's wishes- Sophie stays behind and trains to become a doctor instead. Titans continue to cause trouble, however; and now Sophie must witness these horrors herself.
1. For The Cause: Prologue

Year 845 – The inside of Wall Rose –

The sky was blue and nearly cloudless and for once it was turning out to be a decent day. "Sophie, help your sister out!" A voice was raised and coming out through the opened window of a small gray house. Sitting in the small yard playing in dirt and young girl with black hair stood up and brushed her muddy hands on her once clean yellow dress. "Okay!" She replied back to the open window. Across the street Sophie's sister was standing at a table with a few other adults and was passing out food to other people who were looking a little worse for wear.

"Sophie, you're all dirty, go play somewhere else." Sophie's older sister said as she quickly dismissed the young girl upon seeing her. Sophie didn't completely understand what the big deal about it was, but she understood that her sister was smart and that she knew best. The two girls looked quite similar, but Sophie's eyes were not the bright blue that was her sister's eyes. Sophie's eyes were darker, as was her skin color and her black hair had a slight waviness to it compared to her older sisters straight black hair.

It has been a month since the refugees fled from wall Maria into the inner wall of Rose. Most of the people, even the children, were sent to the fields to do farm work because many of the original wall Rose residents were worried about an inevitable food shortage. It won't be long till many of the people from Wall Maria are sent back to try and reclaim their lost land. The enemy? Even children knew the answer to this question. The culprits responsible were impossibly large monstrosities called 'Titans'. The titans are cold blooded murderers that sought to kill humans, not because they were hungry- but because murder was what they lived for. To eat the human actually serves no nutritional purpose for these monsters; all they want is to kill and feast.

Here inside the safety of the 50 meter walls, human enjoyed a century of peace, but after a colossal titan opened the first hole in the wall, it did not take long for Hell to break loose.

Sophie sat around and watched the refugees as they accepted their meager meals. She also watched her sister, whom she looked up to so much. Her sister in this time of crisis stepped up to help whenever she could, even against our father's wishes.

"Sophie, don't tell mom or dad what I am about to tell you." It was nighttime now and the girls were sitting in their shared room. Their beds were on different ends, but it wasn't a large space so their voices weren't anything more than a quiet whisper. Sophie, who was obviously excited about her sister letting her in on something "big", scooting in closer to hear and made her older sister roll her eyes.

"I'm going to enlist into the military, next year."

"I'm going to enlist with you!" Sophie said a little too loudly in reply. At which her sister curtly shushed her and held a moment of silence to make sure that their sleeping parents hadn't stirred.

"Quiet! Remember, you need to keep this a secret and besides, Sophie, you are not old enough to enlist you still have an extra year to wait." Her older sister scolded quietly.

Sophie looked up to her older sister. Even before the first attack by the titans, her sister was the one who helped, who rescued and the one who spread immense kindness. Sophie knew, even at her young age, her sister was a perfect candidate for the military. She will be the one that saves us all. That is what Sophie truly believed.

The very next year, Sophie's sister left against her parent's wishes to train and become a soldier.

"Sophie, are you going to join the military as well? Are you going to disregard my thoughts and lose my respect?" It was father again. This was getting old, but I could tell he was worried and I guess I understood why, after all, he already lost one of his own to the military. I was honestly considering it, but each time he bothered me about it, I found myself reconsidering my decision to follow my sister.

"Well, Sophie?"

"I don't know." I replied, trying to sound curt, however, I was never known as one to become cross; my father knew that. His eyes softened a bit and he placed a gentle hand on my shoulder in a fatherly way. "The military has already stolen one of my girls- I can't bear the thought of both of them going away." He told me in a sad voice. His hair was much lighter than moms and his eyes were, but I definitely got the waves in my hair and my less pallid skin from him.

"Fine." Maybe joining would be a mistake, "I won't enlist." I really wanted to follow my sister, but in the end, was I that brave? The titans are horrible monsters who kill and eat people without a second thought- I couldn't stand up against that! I was a coward unlike my brave older sister. Talking to my father this most recent time had opened my eyes to that and when I turned the age that enabled me to enlist, I didn't. I stayed home and abandoned the dream that I had held since the attack.

I had given up.

Instead through all that time I studied medicine. It was something my parents approved of greatly compared to my sister's occupational choice. They even supported me by buying text books and writing materials. Two years after my sister had left I began studying under an old doctor who had been travelling where ever he needed to be. I was lucky to have found him for he was always on the move on a so-called mission to help all those within the wall. He claimed that he wasn't virtuous by any means, but in the minds of others he was an excellent and reliable doctor with a vast knowledge over many remedies and techniques. I trained hard and aided him when he treated his patients, and even I had come to think this.

The doctor took me along with him once he started to travel again. Near the winter of the year 847 we even got to travel to the inter most wall, Sina, to help treat some of the nobility who had requested help. People got sick very often in the winter; sometimes the cold was just too much for the human body. Throughout all of this I was able to write to my sister. She seemed surprised that I was giving up on the military, but she seemed understanding toward my decision to stay behind. She often wrote about the people in her squad and how loud and exciting times got for her sometimes. In two years she would be making a decision as to which branch of the military she'd be entering and she had even asked on my opinion to which I couldn't reply. My sister's decision was not easily influenced, but I knew if I said something she would seriously consider it. I didn't want to be like our father, and I didn't want her to question what had already been set in her mind.

A couple years later it happened again. The colossal titan appeared and broke the cannons and before I knew it, I had been recruited along with my teacher to come and treat the injured soldiers. The military was short on doctors and with the recent attack, medical care was in great demand.

So here I was in a horse drawn cart of supplies, on my way toward the wall where the injured were in need of help. My parents were not happy, but from what I heard I couldn't just forget about it like I had with my past endeavors. I just hoped my sister was all right because I heard that on that day a group of trainees in her squad had been blown off of the wall.

It's been four years, and I would finally be reunited with my sister.


	2. Chapter 1 - Sheltered

"Doctor, you and your apprentice are going to be stationed near the Trost gate in order to help aid the military."

_That is what we had been told suddenly on what seemed like a normal day. Since it was a on order by the government the doctor and I couldn't refuse and before we knew it we were being shipped with our supplies toward the gate. While in the cart I noticed the drastic change in scenery from a bright and lively lifestyle, to a barren and almost foreign land. It was hard for me to wrap my mind around the fact that this was the sight of a place not to far from where we came from, and here we were, so blissfully unaware._

The acrid smell of death was foul in the air. This area was like a war zone and I could only imagine what had gone on here. We were finally near Trost, a place that just yesterday had been vibrant with life. Now it was just hollow shell of broken buildings, and probably titans. That is what I heard anyways, I couldn't quite see it due to the 50 meter wall standing firmly in my way. The doctor and I were not allowed on the other side of the wall. It's a precaution and was just something that they believed we would prefer anyways. But in my mind I truly wanted to see what the other side looked like. That is when they started pulling in the wagons of people from the other side; however, these people were _not_ our patients. They were already dead.

"Sophie, do not look away." The doctor's voice was hard and kept me from closing my eyes. I watched as the horses pulled the bodies along in a slow mournful pace. Some bodies were normal, and were people killed by trauma and accidents when they were using their 3D Maneuvering Gear. Others were worse off their bodies were mangles beyond recognition, bitten and half and even worse, decapitated completely. Bile rose up in my throat, but I kept it down for the sake of being able to function later. I had to get used to this, because this was our reality. Immediately then, my sisters picture came to smile. Her kind smile and brilliant determination was still fresh in my consciousness from even four years ago. I was anxious to see her again.

"Sophie, quit daydreaming and come over here!" It was the doctor again and I snapped out of my thoughts as I looked away from the horse drawn cart. He was walking now and leading our horse toward a small building. It was plain and gray and didn't stand nearly as tall as the other buildings around it. It was nestled up against the wall and there were a ton of body grouped inside and in front of it. Most of them were soldier recuperating from the attacks.

The cart came to a stop and I hopped off and went straight to helping the doctor get the supplies out and ready. We set up inside of the building which even had a couple cot in the small space that would be perfect for the severely injured. It was too bad that there were just so many severely injured. The ones who screamed the loudest in agony were the ones we started working on first. It was sad really, to the point where the doctor and I were only treating them just so the atmosphere could be quieter. Honestly, working in these stressful conditions didn't sit well with the old man, but the military was very good at persuasion, that may be the only reason why he was here.

"You are doing very well," I was talking to one girl whose hair was brown and tied into a lose bun. "What's your name." Her arm was gone, and she was freaking out. The weak tourniquet that someone had tied for her wasn't doing its job anymore and the doctor already had his hands full with a man screaming about his back.

"S-Sarah Blair, 104th squad trainee."

"Really!? Than that must mean that you know my sister?" I was cutting off the blood flow so that I could clean it up and get a better look at her arm. Talking didn't really affect my work, but the doctor shot me a glare when he heard my un-work-related conversation.

"I probably do, what is her name?"

"Mina Carolina."

The girl thought for a moment and then smiled slightly, "yeah, I know her- you resemble her a lot," she said quickly. "She was with Armin and a couple others, I believe."

"Is she okay?" I asked hastily.

"Probably, she's with Eren and Thomas and…" She trailed off. "She's with some pretty capable people." She seemed assured and that relieved me. As soon as I was done with this I wanted to see for myself what was out there. I didn't even know what a titan looked like, so believe me, I was curious. The air was hot and stagnant outside throughout the whole day. I had brought Sarah outside while the doctor multitasked on the patients he had already taken on.

It didn't take me long to stitch her arm up and bandage it. There wasn't much hope for her to stay in the military, but I would think she would be grateful now that she had escaped with her life. I hoped that infection wouldn't reach the wound; it would be dangerous if it did.

The old doctor and I were out there for hours and in one day I had gathered more hands on experience then even before in all four years of training. By the end of the day I was more confident and I asked the doctor less for his advice. My time invested in studying had really helped me out this time.

"You did well kid." The doctor said wiping the blood off of his hands with a blood-stained rag. We both looked fatigued, I'm sure, but I was still filled with adrenaline from all the excitement of the day.

From what I heard they were leading a project to plug a breach in the wall with a titan and if it worked out right we would be able to take back Trost. I wondered if my sister was out there helping out with that as well.

"You two," a person's strong voice came out of nowhere, addressing us in a strange and commanding manner. "You will be appointed to helping out with our 'Take Back Trost' plan as well. I'm sorry but cannot rest just yet. You still have some work to do."

* * *

I hope that if anyone is reading this story that they like it. I love this anime/manga and I have always been curious about the medical side of being a titan-slaying-warrior. They never really focused on that and that is my main goal to try and portray what I see as far as the use of the practice. IMPORTANT: After this chapter I'm not sure how well I'll be able to hold back spoilers in the future.

Well, I hoped you liked this update- keep being as awesome as you already are and I will do my best to update within the next few days.


	3. Chapter 2 - Doctor

My stomach growled in protest as I picked up a crate full of bandages and unopened surgical tools. We didn't have the best equipment, but thanks to the military, we had a lot of it. They were taking us even closer; to the other side of the wall because they seemed confident in their ability to protect us now that they finally had a plan against the titans. I believed they would be able to protect us as well, but the doctor seemed doubtful in regards to their decision. It didn't know much about the doctor how I tagging along with. Even after four years, I had always just called him "doctor." The man was shrouded in mystery, but something told me that he knew more about the titans than he let on and I could help but let that suspicion fester.

I placed the crate back onto the cart and dusted off my hands at the completion of being completely packed up again.

"So how are we getting to the other side?" I asked, just now suddenly thinking about it since I knew that there was no chance of them opening the gate.

"A pully, of course," a soldier replied as if I should have known. There were a couple soldiers flanking our now mobile cart on their horses. They were the real-deal, with 3D Maneuvering gear and brown jacket with the Garrison emblem sewn onto the back. I felt intrigued by their presence, my mind immediately praising them for their braveness.

Long ropes on the wall were attached to a wide platform that was steadied by protrusions out of the wall. Over all it wasn' too complex and I watched below as they slowly lifted our cart and then our horse up the 50 meter wall.

When I believed it to be my turn, I quickly found out that that was not that way we were going up there. I never knew that I was so afraid of heights.

One of the soldiers looked at me with eyes that regarded my whole body. I didn't know if I should have been angry as his eyes scanned over me with such a look. It was only after that I realized he was trying to see if he could carry me. After a second he must have decided that I was light enough, because he picked me up under his arm awkwardly and held me tight. That's when it happened. It was the sound of pressure being released and the sounds of metallic wires zipping out from the device they were coiled up into. There was a pause and then the man squeezed his grip on the machine's handle. We were jerked up into the air fast and with a jolt. I watched as the ground under me slowly became smalled and farther away. I screamed the whole time. Sometimes, as we went up it felt as if we were about to fall. Those moments above all were the most horrifying. Did all that soldier have to do this. This was nuts!

As he got up the wall and set me down, tears were clouding my eyes and I was gripping the top of the wall tightly. I was sitting on my hands and knees for the longest time until the doctor was up there as well. He looked completely fine as compared to his frantic and traumatised apprentice. My dark hair was a wind-blown and a great tangled mess. I probably looked insane.

As the shivers gradually stopped I muster up my courage to stand. Even after the scare I still wanted to see the other side. It was something I was always curious about, and I was something I would always regret wanting to witness.

To my horror it was worse than I pictured. In the distance of broken buildings I could see red distinct splatters of blood and large bodied titans roaming the ground in search for prey. These titans were monstrous and large with bodies that were sometimes deformed in shape and bare of clothing. Why had I even wanted to see this? Was this what the soldiers were always up against? I gulped. What my sister was up against this whole time? My blood ran cold as I watched a person near the edge of the wall. Ther gear seemed to move a bit more slowly. _Oh God. _I inched toward the egde to get a better look as one of the small titans chased the soldier down. Why was their gear moving so slowly. I was inwardly cheering them on to move faster, but I didn't realize at the time what should have quite obvious.

A few seconds later the gear seemed to stop all together and the soldier fell.

They had run out of gas.

As the screaming resounded below transforming into a gurgle of sound I looked away. This time I couldn't bear to watch and my teacher did not force me to look. I knew what was coming to them and it made me sick to know that I couldn't do anything to help them. As time passed I was becoming desperately worried about Mina, but as I had heard, I could only trust that the people she was with wouldn't die or abandon her.

Today I had finally realized why people trembled with fear at the simple thought of a titan. I felt as if my eyes had been closed the whole time. It seemed that I was far well off than I had thought and before I knew it, I had started to hate myself.

"Come along Sophie, we have to get down there too."

Looking down that wall I felt woozy. We had only just gotten up and now I was being force to go through with it again. This was a nightmare. Luckily this time the soldier was more understanding to my fear; we travelled down slowly to the roof of a tall building. I was told that this is where I would be helping out for the rest of the day. It was new to me, the concept of treating patients on top of a building, but none of soldiers thought of it as strange. As long as the surface was high above the ground and flat, it had to be okay. 6 meter class titans were walking toward the building once were had settled there and it was the soldier's job to keep them preoccupied.

"Sophie, look over there." The doctor was sitting on a crate and pointing a withered hand to the far side of the wall. From here it looked small and unimportant, but I could faintly see the hole in the gate that had allowed all of these titans in. It was only small in the distance. I knew for sure that it was a gaping breach within the wall.

"How are they going to seal that up within a day? That's crazy." I said aloud the thoughts that were screaming in my mind. It wasn't like the soldiers were obligated to tell us anything but, I sure was curious as ever.

"With the help of a titan they could." The doctor seemed to mumble, but it was almost inaudible and I wasn't sure if I heard him correctly.

He stood up then, just as soldiers started coming in; I noticed that many of the soldiers' expressions were beyond reason. I knew now what had scarred these people. The thought of fighting the titans myself seemed to me like an impossible ordeal- if I was stuck out there, I would definitely die.

"Why do we have to die…?" A man was speaking with eyes that were senseless. They were open and he was conscious, but I do not believe that he was conscious of where he was right now. His mentality was focus on some unseen land where I could only imagine the horrors his mind was fabricating. Like a tense wire about to snap he sat still and continued his glassy stare as I bandaged his wounds. "Why do we have to die?" He repeated again, though this time I was afraid he would start to cry.

"I don't want to die for that fake human." He said something I couldn't comprehend, and his voice was quiet like he didn't want anyone to hear. I knew that the military was strict about people turning into cowards on the battle field. Retreat was not allowed and it was also thought of as an act of treachery. Soldiers were killed for talk like that, and I knew that, yet I didn't know what he meant by a 'fake human.' I, however, didn't bother to ask. This man was too skittish and even I was feeling uneasy by just treating him. I could only meld together pictures of how I imagined that titan could possibly help seal the wall, but in the end I could not.

When the day was completely done both the doctor and I were taken back over the wall without incident. We were commended by the people who asked for our aid and later offered to spend the night in the nearby city so as to avoid a long night-trek home. The doctor and I took up that offer.

With the horse in a small stable attached to a motel in the village I walked in through the front doors of the large wooden building where I was shown my room which had been directly across from the doctor's. It was nice place; our rooms had been rented out through the military and were on them instead of being docked from what we had earned. It was fair amount too and I feel even the doctor seemed slightly glad that he came to help. I heard he had a family, though it was just a rumor, but maybe he was giving money to them- because I knew for a fact that he didn't use it for himself.

This made me wonder what I would do with my cut of the pay; since I was an apprentice I was usually not paid anything, but today had been different. I shed my outer wear. It was covered in blood and I had been eager all day to change from it. I didn't want to walk around and allow people to think I had just killed someone… Or something. With that done I went straight to bed knowing that my aching muscles would feel so relieved once I lay down. I fell asleep straight away, as I inwardly predicted.

The following day, it was the sun's light through the open drapes that woke me up. Pointed right on my face I realized that I had clearly slept in past what the doctor preferred. I redressed and got up opening the door. Why didn't he just come wake me up? I was hoping that he wasn't angry- maybe he would understand since yesterday had been so brutal. I was glad that my dreams were not filled with the pictures of yesterday's scene. The massacre did not sit well with me, of course, and I was definitely prone to nightmares. I guess not dreaming showed just how tired I really had been.

I knocked on the door expecting a grumble for a remark. I prepared myself for a light scolding, knowing the doctor always had it in him. When no response came I opened the door to let myself in, and my jaw dropped.

As my eyes drifted down the wooden floor, I saw the crimson trailing all the way to the bed. My throat closed in fear and my heart began to rapidly beat. There was blood there as well, and a lot of it, but the doctor was nowhere to be seen. His worn leather boots were still on the ground and his books were on a desk, opened to a center page. As fear and shock began to fade the realization of it all was dawning onto me- it was clouding my vision with the tears that always impaired my sight.

_That is when I fell to my knees and screamed._

* * *

Well, well, well_- _This was not when I was planning to release the chapter, but as I continued to type, I realized that I was writing a lot. I don't like large updates because proof reading is more difficult, so I decided to post it now before I added anything else. The story is just getting going and lots of trials still await poor Sophie. Next chapter I will be introducing familiar characters and such and I hope you will enjoy! Thanks for reading, I would love to hear from you because I really take opinions into consideration if you have anything for me. :D Stay awesome.


	4. Chapter 3 - Murderer

_When people described their teachers, often, it was with an attachment; that was definitely true for me. The doctor was like family, he agreed to teach me even though I didn't have much to offer. For four years I had known him and in that time I had grown completely used to him._

_Where was he now?_

Everything that transpired next had all blurred together. Even a trainee doctor like me knew the kind of blood that splattered like that. It was life blood, the blood closest to the heart. I felt sicker than I ever had before as I sat there and cried out. It took all around a minute before the motel staff had come up the stairs to drag me out of the room. My body was limp in their grasp, and they had to drag me across the floor.

I felt abandoned and cold knowing all that was left for me was to go back home. I had no official certification as a doctor- I wasn't even close to gaining that title, and now that my teacher was gone, it felt as if all the progress I was working on until this morning had been completely lost.

Why was this happening? Just yesterday I had been praised for my help and it made me feel great to have learned such skills. To naively think he was still alive was only false hope now. As military police officers filed past me and up the stair way I began to wonder if they would find him.

"You are Sophie Carolina, correct?" A male voce had caught my distant attention, but I did not look up from where I sat on the floor. I could not trust myself to stand. I still wanted to cry more, and I would only end up back here again.

"You are a suspect in our investigation, I am afraid you will have to come with me." He tried again, and this time I lifted my head. The man was older, and his shoulders were broad. On his uniform was the symbol of a unicorn; he was a part of the military police- a supposedly great honor. With the help of others I was weakly escorted out and in a dazed manner I only mumbled small replies to the barrage of questions he threw at me.

"This will all be settled once the investigation is finished, then we will figure out whether or not to send you home based on what we find." His voice was untrusting, and his eyes in this light looked mean and reprimanding. He led me to a building with four emblems of the countries defense system decorating the front, looking at them all I was able to somehow recognize them as what I had seen on the soldiers' uniforms. There was the two swords crossed which had probably been the emblem my sister was wearing, then the rose among the thorns- the Garrisons, the Unicorn's head signifying the military Police and finally the two wings of blue and white, they were the Scouting Legion.

Looking at the four signs I was beginning to feel slightly intimidated. Why was I going here? Was I that important? Even though murder was definitely a big deal it didn't seem like a huge enough reason for the military to become involved. Regardless of that, I was innocent!

My arms were tied behind my back with a thin rope and a large hand was clamped over my shoulder, guiding me through the doors. Inside the large building it was much cooler than the morning sun's rays people in uniforms were walking around seemingly preparing for some sort of court case.

"Don't worry, this isn't for you." The larger man holding my shoulder half-heartedly assured. He wasn't the same guy from the motel, but he didn't sound any more kind.

"Why would you bother telling me that?" If I was a suspect, I couldn't understand why he would try to make me feel relieved, unless, I was going straight to a more terrible place. I didn't want to panic, but I was definitely nervous now with each step he took me down the hallway.

"…Doctor was an important asset, and you manage to lose him?"

Behind one of the many closed doors of the hallway I was able to hear bits and pieces of an otherwise important conversation.

"What about the girl?" Another voice asked just as we had reached the door. It was clear that the man bringing me to the room didn't seem like he knew completely what was going on either. He knocked on the door and waited as the people in the room silenced before pushing the wooden door open.

"I've brought her as ordered," the man said urging me forward into the now-silent room.

Inside of the room, there were people dressed in militia uniforms. The emblems varied slightly, but I couldn't pay much attention to that due to the blur of thoughts that raced through my head. Was I really under so much suspicion, that these people had to get involved? With my raging thoughts tormenting my mind, I felt my inside begin to twist as I was told to walk forward.

The man who led me here slammed the door behind me, but even he no longer stood in the room. I was left to the eyes of very superior looking people. Their eyes seemed to judge me as I could only watch them for so long without feeling intimidated and afraid. All of them looked so cold, and almost frightening to an extent.

"Sophie Carolina." A voice addressed me, "You have been accused of the murder to the unidentified doctor whom which you travelled with. Your plea?"

"Not guilty, sir." I said that very quickly after he had finished his sentence. My haste had formed looks of intrigue and doubt, but no one said anything about it.

"It says here that you were a… Student of this man. For how long would you say that was true?"

"For four years."

"Yes, and in that time did you consider yourself well-learned, have you completed all you needed to know?" His inquiry held questions within his own question; I recognized the accusation immediately from the look in his eyes. I couldn't help but glare back at him.

"Of course not, sir," I started putting as much venom into my tone as I could, "I am still far from knowing everything that the Doctor did." I had so much to learn… Now he was gone and now I could feel even my own freedom being ripped away.

"I am not a murderer! My life is dedicated to the protection of lives! What proof do you have that I was even involved!?" It burst out of me before I could stop it. The words I had hung on into my head came out without stopping. I didn't regret them though, because from the looks of everyone else, it had taken them off-guard.

"That is true in a sense, we do not have much proof that you were there- however, that still has yet to cover our suspicions."

"Your suspicions are wrong," I said that knowing it was out of place. Even if I was innocent, I could tell this person was a high-ranked official. I would be in deep trouble if he was offended by my tone.

"Even a murderer can say that much." Another man piped in, earning the grunts in agreement and a solid nod of the head. I clenched my hands together in an attempt to hold my patience which was quickly running out again. I took a deep breath. So, in the end, was I really going to lose all of this? What about my family- my sister?

"I have a proposition for you," the man finally spoke after a long drawn out silence. "Well, it was actually a proposition for the Doctor, but since that has clearly become impossible, I have decided to extend the offer to you."

I looking up from my hands which for a moment were shaking in fear of their decisions, I had been wondering what we were waiting for. Wondering if they would decide my fate then. His words were not what I expected, but I gained hope from them.

"Since we have decided that you are the main suspect of the Doctor's murder, we cannot afford to let you roam free. So, we would like you to become a part of the military- join the scouting legion and become a medic for them. I'm afraid refusing would only force us to keep you here until the investigation is cleared- this is your only alternative. If I might add, searching for evidence and assembling this into a court-case would take a very long time- and it doesn't seem like we have a lot of that, nowadays." His eyes were dead serious as my heart began to slowly descend into fear. My body took on my actions then, without my mind's consent, I nodded my head once without wanting to, and spoke very clearly, "I accept your offer."

* * *

Writing this, I felt I had to keep in mind that this primitive society didn't collect evidence with ease- or accurately for that matter. At least, that is how I perceived it. If you hadn't understood what that court room was being set up for, it is actually a spoiler in disguise, and I'm sure you will get it if you read the manga- but I really don't like ruining things. As I said before, you had been warned in my previous chapters. I just hope you enjoy this chapter, and I am really quite excited in writing the next one... I thought for sure I would have one of the characters written in this, but some things just don't end up as planned- maybe next chapter ;) Please leave feedback- maybe a fav, or a follow - you know? Just something to show me that ya like what your reading. :)

,Stay freezing (I mean cool)

~ArcticCircle :3


	5. Chapter 4 - My One Week of Training

(Please read: This is my final warning about spoilers, this is based off the manga and reading further will reveal vaguely what is to come in the story. If you only watch the anime then I advise you to keep this in mind if you plan to read any more.)

_On my own I have never truly made a real decision such as this. Since I was young my parents have always been a determining factor in what I did, it was either them or my sister, but I could never find the strength on walk on my own two feet. _

_ Today was different. _

"Good, then training will be necessary in order for you to progress, but fear not. It is not the same training that our regular procedures follow." I was informed before I was sent on my way. I wasn't allowed to go home, so I stayed in the Militia's Barracks where cots lined the walls with upper and lower levels of the room. Most of the beds were taken by soldiers who were either dead or away. Some people came in at different times with worn and depressed expressions; they were the relatives who had come to retrieve their lost-ones belongings. There was never that much to take except for the old clothes that they came with.

I could not offer solace, and I did not try to as I watched people come and go. I spent the rest of that day lying on the cot, feeling just as worn out as those people had appeared. With titans being the most rapidly increasing problem toward the humans, it turned out my training was much nearer than I expected. For that first day, I was alone with my tormenting thoughts.

"What's with those clothes, soldier?" A man who was tan and bald, with deep sunken eyes seemed to look down at me from where he stood- he was known as Sargent Bertrand. His shoulders were broad and he looked like he had seen his fair share of death with cold eyes like his. Every sentence he had spoken to me was loud, obnoxiously so. I was immediately at a loss for words in the presence of this guy.

"T-There… They are-."

"Speak UP!" He yelled back at my pathetic stammering. I found my body wanting to inch away from him. I knew I was leaning back slightly, but hopefully it looked like I was standing tall.

"These clothes are I all I have!" The clothes I had travelled here with, with the Doctor were still covered in blood. I was never given the opportunity, or the means to wash it, but maybe that was an excuse. I guess I had merely forgotten about them after all that's transpired within the past two days.

I was training alone to learn the basics of using the 3D Maneuvering gear with this man in order to gather the concept as quickly as possible. Since I was just a medic, I was told there would be no need to delve further into the harsh training of defeating titans. All I needed to know was how to gas-up and run away. The blades I would soon be holding were to be mere decorations-as was my uniform.

I was watched by him as I slipped my feet into the leather straps of the 3D Maneuvering gear. The best way to learn, or so I was told, was to do it myself. "You are going to be wearing this often," he said, "so you need to know how to put it on, yourself." That made sense, so I didn't argue, but now that I was being put to the test, I found myself more troubled. It wrapped under the soles of my feet and crossed behind my legs and ran up my thighs- I knew that much from observing other soldiers. From there it's balancing intricacy laced around my upper body for as much control as it could offer me, yet I struggled to figure out how it was applied.

It took me a couple tries to put it on correctly after I had thoroughly disappointed Bertrand, who was still overseeing my training. But finally when I was wearing the training gear, I was hooked up to a wooden mechanism that when cranked, would lift me up from the ground. This was test for normal soldiers. As I was told in order to become a soldier this was the main thing you had to master. The deciding factor for most was now something I would be forced to learn how to do._ I wish I wasn't afraid of heights. _

Unease settled in and slowly the trainer turned the handle. I was told that it was second nature- and that most people with a little effort could do this, but fear that I couldn't was prevalent inside of me. It was fear of failure, and fear of what I knew would come if I am able to keep my balance. It was beginning to dawn on me that from now on, my life was the military's, and I would be out there with others, facing unimaginable dangers from enemies we could barely defeat.

My feet were beginning to leave the ground. I was on the balls of my feet, then my toes. Soon the ground would no longer be under my feet. My legs were already pressing against the bands of leather. I could feel the restraint- the means of control. I knew that if I pressed my legs with the right amount of pressure against the straps, I could stay upright.

I was off the ground and with a jerk I nearly toppled over. My strategy at first was not going as planned. I thought I was going to fall, but before I could my fear's reflexes kicked in and I lean the opposite way, in doing so I managed to stay up. My body was as tense as a taught wire; the trembling in my limbs was not something I could completely control, but in order to maintain this position the unsteadiness appearance was necessary.

"A little shaky, but good job- that's saves me a lot of trouble. Honestly if you could not do this much then I wouldn't be able to see your worth."

I took the Sargent's words as complement; I was unable to feel deterred at this point in time due to achieving this. _Why had I doubted myself so much? Was my self-esteem so low? _I knew that I needed to have more confidence in myself- but the idea was so foreign since most of my life had been decided for me. Maybe this was a good thing; maybe this change was the real beginning of my life. It must have been, because I knew that I have never felt this good.

My lessons from then on were short, "don't do anything extreme," and "always listen to your superiors," were common phrases when communicating with the Sargent. All around it had been about a week, learning under this man. Every morning I would get up super early and walk to a building that the military commonly used as a classroom to the new recruits. There, I would sit for hours and learn about the titan's: their weak spot, the reason that they do not die easily, and how to efficiently kill them. Not that I would be doing that myself.

At the end of the day it would be nearly night time, but from there I was told to practice using the 3D maneuvering gear that had been issued to me.

So here I stood at the edge of a small forest near the wall on the outskirts of the town. I held the blades away from my body and clutched the mechanism to release the arrow shaped hooks. My teeth automatically clenched together and that horrible jerking sensation picked me up off the ground as I was reeled in like a fish. Panic set in as I came close to what I hooked myself onto. If I didn't let go now I would be eating tree bark- or dead, but that thought didn't help. My fingers let go and I slowed down a bit enough to catch me feet on the tree. I scrambled grab a branch to help myself up; my movements were awkward and clumsy but I managed to haul myself onto the branch.

This was going to take a while to get used to. Holding and releasing the mechanism was more difficult than I thought. The initial fear that I had for merely being hooked up was nothing compared to actually using the gear. I had to practice it more- being like this wasn't going to help me run away from titans.

"Mina… Wait for me." I said aloud as I clenched my fist tightly. I was doing my best to catch up with her. I had three years of training that I needed to cover and it was not easy, but the idea of being reunited was definitely a driving force.

It seemed that the scouting legion would be leaving soon outside of Wall Rose's protection. I had to be ready before then. Trainee class 104, the class Mina is in, will be deciding what branch of the military they will be going into tomorrow this was very important for people who join the ranks because it would impact their future, and I would be there to watch. Feeling giddy after an hour's worth of practice, I headed back into town were only a few people still walked about in the streets.

"Aren't you afraid?" The mumbled words of people walking in front of me drifted to my ears.

"Of course I am! How can the military actually accept the help of a titan? They are mankind's enemies! They always have been- always will!" From his tone I could tell this man was deeply concerned and with reason. I was afraid of the titans too, and the thought of having one help up was unbelievable. I couldn't even believe my ears as I listened to these two. I did not doubt them, though, because it made sense with the bit of rambling that I heard from the delusional soldier I had been treating the day before I was recruited.

"What if it gets out of control? What if it goes on a rampage within the wall!?"

"This titan's a part of the scouting legion now- the beast will be leaving the premises anyways-."

"I hope it perishes out there."

"That would be for the best."

In my lessons with the Sargent, I was never told of this important piece of information. Wasn't I joining the scouting legion too? Did that mean that I would have to fight with that dreaded titan? I was getting scared all over again. What if it went berserk like they had said? If it was staying with us than it could kill us any time it decided to! There was so much risk! There was too much risk!

Feeling slightly betrayed I realized that this was my sentence for taking the better sounding deal. Karma. I knew this was too good to be true. The fact of it all was that no one wanted to join the scouting legion, so they'd send suspected criminals in order to simply get rid of me. It was sounding more and more like a conspiracy- like an easy way out for them to handle things.

I was beginning to feel bitter. Hatred was boiling in my blood now towards the military that was supposed to protect people. The help of a titan? I just couldn't understand how a titan could feel that sort of sympathy for humans. To help us was unheard of! I just didn't understand it!

_ Tomorrow I would meet up with my so-called "comrades" for the first time, and maybe I could get some of my thoughts straightened out. I wanted to see for myself what sort of help a titan could be._

* * *

_This chapter was longer than usual as thanks for waiting so long for the update. I started my part-time job for the summer again this year, so I hope you will understand. :) I hope you enjoyed this update! Many of you probably know what lies ahead for Sophie in the future, and I plan to make that a point of impact for her with her current mindset. If you haven't realized this already, I wanted to make this story a character building story where thoughts and strengths visibly change over time. Please review if you have any tips/suggestions/comments/complaints/ anything really. Drop a favorite, or a follow and make my day if you like this story! It really gives me the strength to write when I see support for it! Thanks for reading- you're appreciated!_


	6. Chapter 5 - Meeting Eren Jeager (Part 1)

_To die for strangers who don't acknowledge the sacrifice you have made, is not what anyone desires… So why do people bother joining the military? _

_ To protect people who don't even care? _

_ I've started to think that, after yesterday. _

The next morning I was given my uniform and the 3D maneuvering gear that I would be assigned to from now on. It was the same as the practice ones I was given but at the same time, it was different. For me this was more official- I was finally a part of the military as a medic and although I couldn't fight the titans, the ones in charge had ultimately decided that I needed this gear in order to protect myself should the need ever arise.

I was almost ready to go. I slipped on my brown jacket; the fabric was crisp and new, it smelled musty from being folded and placed away for so long. That didn't surprise me since the scouting legion has always had difficulties recruiting people.

I carried my green weather cloak under my arm for the time being, from the looks of the outside, I knew it was going to be a hot day, and I was not in the mood to overheat. I was not in a bad mood, though, because today was special. Today was the day that I would witness the 104th graduating class pick which branch of the military that they would join- and more importantly I would get to see my sister once again. I eagerly walked through the camp where the trainees had spent most of their four years. Finally I found the place. It was made of wood, like everything else, and built like a stage. Not many people were present but I recognized the scouting legion's emblem on the coats of some of the people. Their eyes immediately went to me up approaching, and I, in an instant, became self-conscious.

I stopped walking a few paces before them and as I had been previously instructed I brought my closed hand over my heart and my other went behind my back in a formal salute. "I am the new medic, my name is Sophie Carolina." Surprisingly, it didn't sound bad. I was of course, a little nervous, but all in all I had managed to fool myself into sounding confident.

A man with short blond hair stood apart from the few others. His eyes looked serious and strong and he was tall and muscular. I could tell he was my superior, even if he hadn't said it shortly after.

"Welcome to the cause Sophie, my name is Irvin Smith." His expression softened and he held out his hand to me, which I hesitantly took. "I've heard of your case and I respect the decision you have made. Do you know what is going on here now?"

"Today is when the trainees will decide which division they will be going into," I replied.

"Correct. I'm sorry that we can't really brief you on much more for now please wait with the others."

"Yes, sir."

Me and a few others stood in the corner of the stage as the trainees quickly assembled. As they didn't I couldn't help but feel out of place standing with such elite looking people. Looking around I didn't recognize anyone of them. They, on the other hand didn't seem to interested in me and their eyes looked sophisticatedly focused on the matters ahead. The scouting legion would present first. But as Irvin spoke, I didn't know much about what he was talking about. "We've made progress unseen before in mankind's victory. As you have already guessed, I'm talking about Eren Jeager."

Baffled, I wondered why the commander was only talking about one soldier in particular. Who was this Eren Jeager? What was his significance in all of this? I continued to listen, unable to understand how one soldier could be the leading cause for our so-called "victory". I noticed how tense the air got at the mention of his name, in an instant, the atmosphere changed.

"I assure you no doubt he is on our side, risking his life for our common cause." The commander said with and honest sounding voice.

That's when it all came together. From the nonsensical rambling, to the gossip and rumors- to this single name spoken at such a strange time- it was spelled out before me now.

Eren Jeager was the titan- the one who was a part of the scouting legion. The enemy. A titan with a name. I felt my fingers clench together in a fist. I wondered now if Eren was near, but there was no titan to be seen.

Maybe they were keeping him away from the people. I could understand why- I wouldn't mind seeing that monstrosity killed by the soldiers. If I had, had a choice in all of this, when the commander told the trainees to choose to leave now if they did not wish to join the scouting legion, I would have done just that. However, right now my eyes were trained on the crowd as I tried to find Mina amongst the many cadets standing still before the stage. If her hair was the same then I would be able to pick her out easily. Always tied into pigtails and framing her pale features- that was what I remembered, anyways.

No matter how hard I searched, I did not see her in the sea of faces and the longer I looked, the more worried I became. _There are probably just too many people; maybe someone is blocking my view of her. _I was certain of this as I watched people slowly trickle away.

As expected, there were many who didn't want to be in the scouting legion- it really didn't surprise me, and it did not look like it surprised any of my comrades either.

Those who stayed- however-either looked extremely brave, or completely upset. Some of the people of who remained were even crying out of fear. But no matter how hard I looked, the black haired girl that I knew as my sister was nowhere to be seen, and I was getting a dreadful feeling in the pit of my stomach.

"Is this the graduating class, 104?" I said very quietly to one of the people wearing a green cloak. He was average height and had light colored hair parted to the side, upon closer inspection his eyes looked mean and scrutinizing.

"Hell- were you even payin' attention newbie?" He growled toward me with that obscene expression. "Course it is!" He continued adding a 'humph' at the end as if to make a point- a mockery out of my stupid question.

But my mind was already elsewhere. I had no time to linger on his attitude, now that worry deeply set in my nerves. My hand tightened on my cloak and I stepped forward once, onto the stage setup; I was unable to hold back.

"Where_ is_ she?" I didn't try to fight back the words now, because they were already spilling out, "Where is Mina?" All this time I had been working so hard to see her. She was here; I knew it- but if she got too far away from me now then our reunion would be pushed back once more. Which way did she walk? I had so much to tell her- so many exciting and sad stories to share. I wanted to hear hers as well, as soon as we got the chance.

_I didn't want to be separated like we had been ever again. _

* * *

Thanks once again for reading! The chapter I wrote out was very long so I split it into multiple parts. The next part will be posted in a few days. ^^ If you like the story so far favorites and follows are appreciated. If you think something needs to be changed/corrected/suggested or if you'd just like to comment then please send a review; I would be happy to hear from you and I take into consideration what you may have to say. Just seeing these things gives me the initiative to write more- so thank-you and see you next time. :3


	7. Chapter 6 - Meeting Eren Jeager (Part 2)

"Medic, cease your useless chatter!" The words from behind came from the same man from earlier my arm was grabbed and I was yanked backwards nearly off my feet.

"Are you retarded, huh?" He scolded me loudly with spit flying everywhere. "I think you should jus-!"

"Auruo, knock it off." Cutting the man off was a woman with chin length light brown hair. She gave him an annoyed look for a moment before Auruo left with an indifferent shrug.

"I'm sorry about him, uh..?"

"Sophie." I said quickly.

"Right, Sophie." She smiled slightly, "That Auruo is always trying to copy Corporal Revaille… It's pretty annoying

"My name is Petra," she said with a smile, "it's a pleasure to meet you."

"Same here," I replied reaching for her outstretched hand. Well at least there seemed to be one level headed person here. However this little encounter didn't help rid me of the eyes that now bore into my back thanks to that outburst I just had. I felt my embarrassment when silence covered us once more.

Commander Irvin finished speaking to the newest scouting legion a couple minutes later. In everyone's eyes were the sullen looks of defeat. Some had strength, but it was very few and definitely no sign of my sister. I was looking to wonder off, to sulk like I had wanted to since the beginning, but we still had things to do in preparation for the first expedition in the newly formed group.

I was still in the dark in regards to our mission, but I knew very well that it involved going outside the walls in one month's time through the Karanese district. It was the start of many escapades with reaching a basement full of secrets as the goal. I wondered just what could be important to know that would be in a household's basement, but I didn't ask because I didn't want any of my newest comrades to think I was complaining. None of them seemed to overly kind to me. Untrusting to say in the least, but it was understandable since I was in no way equal to them.

When I thought like this, I could already tell that this next month spending time with them was going to be awful.

And it was…

-One week later –

"Hey, medic I have something to ask you." It was soldier, and by the slur of his voice and his low tone, I could tell that he was most definitely drunk.

I was sitting at a poorly leveled wooden table eating a thick slice of tough stale bread. Lunch for soldiers was no different from the lunch of the refugees that my sister had been serving a few years back.

"How are you," he hiccupped one and continued, "a part of the scouting legion?" He had sat next to me, uncomfortably close which made the smell of alcohol more noticeable on his breath.

I gagged when I breathed in and leaned to the side a bit, setting my piece of bread down.

"It's hard to explain," I said breathing through my mouth. "Why do you ask?" I choked out.

"Cause you just look so young, fresh almost." For the first time I noticed his eyes one me, scanning my whole body and making me shiver with disgust. I was no beauty, by any means- both my sister and I looked to be about the most ordinary girls out there, but it was true that the majority of soldiers that were around us right now were ragged and dirty as opposed to me, sitting in a crisp and clean uniform without a bruise, nor even a scratch on my skin. My fingers were smooth and uncalloused, my nails clean of dirt or anything else- I didn't have dark circles under my eyes either, which I sould see was common among the soldier who probably had seen something awful.

I was the uncommon one here. The outcast. I quickly realized that most of my comrades seemed to think that too after this encounter. Divided. Alone. Ostracized. Mina… Where are you?

A hand clamped over my shoulder and a boy about my age with strong green eyes gave the man sitting next to me a glare, "let's go." He muttered quickly and turned immediately as if he was holding himself back to say anything else.

I didn't pick up my piece of bread, forgotten, I left it there by the drunken scout who sat there in a daze, looking after the two of us in a scrutinizing manor- as if he was judging the both of us.

I had thought it was only me. But as me left the dining hall, eyes were cast on not just me but mainly the uniformed person before me. They watched him in the most strangest way, with eye that looked almost afraid, but filled with loathing.

The atmosphere lifted a bit once we were outside and the man turned around glancing toward me with a disinterested look; he seemed focused on something else, something far away.

"Thanks?" I hadn't wanted to make it sound like a question, but I almost felt rude interrupting his thoughts. He blinked once and nodded.

"Some of those people are idiots," he mumbled, "you are the medic right? What's your name again?"

I could tell from his actions, his tone- but mostly- from his eyes. This person has seen more of the titans than I have, that much was easy to figure out. He seemed trustworthy compared to others- but maybe that was just because he was closer to my age.

"My name's Sophie, Sophie Carolina."

Silence followed disturbed only by the unintelligible chatter coming from inside the dining hall. His eyes widened after the mention of my name- or rather, my last name. Feeling time freeze at the moment my body locked up and before I knew it- it felt like I had lost nearly all control of my actions.

"What is it?" I said; my voice basically a whisper. My heart began to pound again and I was feeling an overwhelming sense of panic spreading through my body. Seconds did not tick by, we barely stood there for a moment, yet it felt like minutes were passing.

Then it came. A voice that broke a very short lived silence, but it was all it took to instill fear into my heart.

"Eren!"


	8. Chapter 7 - Meeting Eren Jeager (Part 3)

_Eren? Eren Jeager? _A boy with blond hair rushed up to the two of us, followed by a girl with dark hair easily keeping stride beside him.

"You disappeared so suddenly that I couldn't tell you-." The blond stop speaking, his breath catching after his blue eyes caught sight of me. "You are-!" He started as he seemed to recognize me. I guessed that me must have been present a week ago and had witnessed my outburst on the stage..

But before I could continue I had stepped back away from the three of them. Outside the wind blew a strong gust at us, carrying a very light rain overhead, yet no one moved.

"You know her don't you.. My sister.." I took a ragged breath, "where is Mina?" At this point just from the expressions on their faces, I knew something bad had happened. My teeth clenched together at their combined silence. "Answer me dammit!" I yelled without patience- in a fear induced rage.

"Mina's gone." The blond replied his eyes wide with sadness and pity, his had raised his voice over mine and he lowered his eyes to his feet as if in shame. "She fell in battle… Heroically as a soldier."

As his words slowly seeped in, my anger and fear receded, taking my strength with me. In the muddy ground I dropped to my knees feeling throat tighten up, and my limbs shake. I had expected that to be his reply, yet it had still taken me by surprise. I wanted to doubt him and tell him that he was lying- but my heart knew he wasn't. Mina wasn't around, I should have known that when I didn't see her a week ago, but I kept denying that idea that something had happened.

My teacher was a gone. My sister was dead. I was here all alone. I could not help the tears that started to flow out with the rain. It had been gloomy all day, and it held back just to make matters worse.

The boy who the blond had called "Eren" took a step toward me, but I instantly looked up from my tears and tensed, "stay back you monster!" I could not stop the hurtful words from leaving my mouth. It took him by surprise to, and he stood still where he was- not intimidated, just surprised at my outburst.

I was acting childish, but I didn't care- now that Mina was gone I..I had no more hope left to feel here in this place.

"You are the titan… Aren't you?" I said filling my voice with hatred. After all I had just heard I felt like I was punched in the gut and left to sputter without air like a gaping fish. I didn't know what to say or think anymore- yet I spoke without direction. "I… Titans are the reason my sister is dead. No matter what they say… You are not my comrade… If anything… You are my enemy."

I stood up clenching my hands together in silence. I had to go somewhere else. I didn't want to see these people. I didn't want to see anyone! I left the three, walking away aimlessly and feeling nauseated. I didn't care what the commander thought. The titan called Eren was not on mankind's side, beause titans were the enemy, so he was too.

Nothing mattered any more. I didn't care if I wasn't accepted by even_ those_ people. Now that my sister was lost, I didn't care about anything.

_Not even my life._

* * *

I feel that the experience of losing someone close to you is like feeling the warmth rush out of you body all at once. I can only imagine that Sophie would feel this too at this point. Though it was hard for me to describe all the feelings and emotions that mix in at the loss of a loved one. Its a feeling that you wont understand until it happens to you yourself, that is absolute in my opinion. - Sorry for such a depressing chapter! But "in every life rain must fall", and that holds true for everyone. Thank you for reading thus far and this concludes the 'Meet Eren Jeager' combined chapters. Next chapter will be the start of the mission outside of the walls!

If you like this story so far let me know! Leave a favorite a follow, or even a review and trust me, that alone will make my day! If you didn't, maybe you could tell me what I could do to improve on my stories, feedback is appreciated no matter what it is! Thanks as always SnK fans! You are awesome!

-Stay frozen :3

~ArcticCircle


	9. Chapter 8 - The First Expedition Extras

A Flash back of a Stay Cat (Part 1) (Side story)

_"Sophie! Mina!" Mother. Her eyes had rings under them, and crow's feet pulling at the corners with age. Her black hair, a match of our own, was chopped short to her chin. Her blue eyes were in a set glare toward Mina and I as we hovered over a stray kitten in the house. _

_ It was in my room that we were going to hide it. A poor lost little tabby kitten sitting under the shelter of a porch during a rainy day was what we had found then. It mewed quietly out of hunger, calling us with its bright catty eyes. The thought of it dying of starvation was hard to ignore, so on that day we had brought it home. _

_ "We can't feed a stray! We can barely feed ourselves!" _

_ She made us get rid of it. She sent us outside and she watched us set the creature down and turn our backs on it. We had given up on saving the kitten. Or so she had initially believed. _

- For the Cause -

The days moved on, but the numbness I felt made them blur together and move slowly. I did not have the motivation that I possessed when I was first tasked in joining the scouts and so most of my days were spent in an unprogressive sort of solitude.

This continued on until the day we would depart for the outside. It wasn't an actual mission, or so I was told. The commander simply wanted to take us out for experience, and so that what we would do. The sun was still hidden under the horizon, and the sky was dark when I arrived at the meeting room where Levi explained the position everyone would be in. Only the leaders of the sections we were separated into were present here; everyone else was getting ready for the expedition.

The meeting room was a tight fit around a large square table dimly lit by a gas-lantern sitting atop the map taped to the wood surface. The faces lit by the faint light looked ghostly and sallow, there was fear among even the high ranking soldiers, but that didn't completely surprise me. What did surprise me- however- was my position within the guard. I was posted in the back center with the Corporal and his team, which included the cursed titan that was hidden in a human's skin. Eren Jeager. This part of the guard was in charge of Eren's safety and was the safest place to be in the whole formation.

_Why did that make me so angry? Was it the fact that I had to work closer to this titan? That I had to help protect him? Or that while actual humans were on the outer edges fighting for their lives, he was on the inside of the formation away from the action and hiding within their protection? _

I made an effort to listen to the plans, but they were very vague and I was having a hard time concentrating with all of these raging thoughts clouding my mind. I still haven't found out what became of Mina's remains. _Were there any remains at all? _

_What would I tell mother? Father? _My heart clenched painfully and I missed the rest of what Levi was explaining. Before I knew it he had already dismissed everyone and we were going to our respective places.

"Are you okay, dear?" _Hanji Zoe. _Her hair was brown and tied up, and she wore special glasses that were strapped around her head so that they wouldn't fall off during battle. From what I knew she was incredibly intelligent, and one of the scouting legion's greatest assets, both as a scientist and a combatant.

"Yes," I lied. Physically I was well. Nothing hurt, I wasn't even sore from my training anymore. However, my heart- it ached. I felt as I if I had been betrayed by humanity, not just once, but multiple times. Now I was leaving the safety of the walls against my will to protect a titan! I was _not _okay.

"I see," She smiled slightly, kindly, "well do your best out there- we will be safe within the walls in no time don't you worry." Her reassurance wasn't exactly what I was searching for, but for some reason my spirits lifted. Just a little.

I mounted a brown horse that was issued to me that morning. He wasn't named from what I knew, so half-heartedly, I nicknamed him "Free". Free was equipped with a cheap leather saddle, a bridal, and many small leather saddle bags holding emergency medical supplies. Free and I joined the line-up as soon as we were ready to go.

All of us soldiers began to move out shortly after; most of us on horseback. We walked through the towns between us and toward the nearest gate, attracting the attention of the villagers as we passed, overhearing excited and angry whispers- most of us ignored it. In that time I was alone with my thoughts as I stared at Free's twitching ears and Eren Jeager's back. I did not dare move any closer to him than I had to. I was afraid of him and I didn't want to be near him when he decided to quit the human-façade. I would not be his victim.

The buildings gradually looked more barren as we traversed nearer to the wall. There, there was a gate, large and imposing, and closed tightly. The gate to the area of land humans had lost. Curiosity burned throughout the ranks of soldiers as we rode on, and the gate slowly lifted as the Garrison forces saw us approaching. It was all clear to leave the safety of the walls, but the safety could not be guaranteed later on, and all of us knew that.

Someone was crying up ahead. It was out of fear, yet they made no move to turn around. It would be treason if they did. I wondered if they would be killed for deciding to turn back now. That's what I wanted to do, but I didn't dare even turn my head.

Outside the wall the land was quiet except for the constant pounding of the horses hooves on the soil. The warm sun was harsh to the eyes, but bearable in the early hours of the morning. The soldiers gradually spread out into their groups, strategically placed miles apart from each other.

Where we were heading seemed to be on the whims of a single man; Commander Irvin, and from what I heard not much was known about his plans thus far- not even by the higher ranking soldiers. I wondered briefly if Corporal Levi knew, I snuck a glance over at him from the corner of my eye. His face was the same as always. He looked like he was sulking; it was like he was angry or tired, but I couldn't tell since he always wore the same expression.

"What is it?" He asked without looking toward me. His dark eyes were focused straight ahead in a disinterested mask.

"Ah- Nothing." I mumbled feeling a bit ashamed for my staring. I looked down at the reigns in my hands realizing for once how little there was to actually look at. The plains were without many trees or animals, and the open field of grass was getting rather repetitive to watch.

Then that's when I realized that strangeness of it all. _Where were the titans? _

Were the groups stationed at the edges of the formation miles away seeing any of the titans? I hoped not; if the whole expedition went along this perfectly then I might be able to rethink my initial fears of the scouting regiment. It actually was starting to feel like a simpler job.

_Oh how naïve that thought really was. _

The ground rumbled then and the peace within my mind was shattered like glass. A chill ran up my spine even though there was no sign of a single titan, I was still afraid- since I knew that only a titan could make the land shake in fear in such a violent shockwave of power like that.

* * *

I am sorry for the amount of time it took to post this update. You know what brought about this release? I got two messages in my email from people who liked my story.. It was very heartwarming a nice to read. It brought me back into the spirit of writing and motivated me greatly. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

I love feedback – favorites – follows, and long emails J and because I love these things so much, I will dedicate my next chapter to the next person to review no matter what, good or bad. Thanks for being such patient and great readers- I appreciate every one of you, even to the readers who simply wish to read the story- all of you thanks for the support!

-Stay frozen

~ArcticCircle


	10. Chapter 9 - Running Extra

_(Flash back of a stray cat (Part 2) (Side Story) (To those watching the anime and reading the manga, to avoid writing what you are watching and reading I've decided to take this story down its own little path) _

_ "Sophie, let's name the kitten Free." _

_ "That's a weird name." I mumbled as I cuddled the tabby under my cheek. "It doesn't sound right; it's weird." I repeated. _

_ "I am the one hiding it and feeding it so I get to name it- it's only fair, right?" _

_ "Right." _

_ Free lived in the covers of Mina's bed, under the wooden deck, in the little wooden crate, and anywhere that we could stuff her since we weren't allowed to keep her. Oh, the things we would do for this cat- the lengths we went, just to feed it in secret. _

_ I was wrapping a piece of tough jerky in a cloth that Mina gave me to give to Free, as I walked toward my home from watching her a work. _

_ "Hey, child, just where are you heading?" _

_ A man leaning against a building regarded me with downcast eyes. He was older with gray hair and a wrinkled face. I don't know why but I stared up at him I felt shiver run up my spine. _

-For the Cause-

Everyone's eyes seemed to pop out of their sockets when the ground began to rumble. Children in this time were smart enough to know what that signified, it wasn't hard to misread, and with profound resonance it stuck fear into the heart of our soldiers riding on horseback. That's when we finally saw it. The black smoke- the signaling signs of an aberrant.

My heart clenched as I urged my horse a little faster.

"Corporate!" One of those in Levi's squad yelled as they rode up behind him in fervor. From then on I couldn't hear what they were saying, and I didn't know if I wanted to know. My heart was already thrust into un ease, I might cause myself to pass out if I fret anymore.

Whilst not paying much attention realized before it was too late that we were heading into a deep dark forest.

Why were we here all of a sudden, in a grove of tall, gigantic trees, I haven't the slightest. I couldn't believe how grand these mighty trees stood, and I stared at them as they flew by in the wind, passed by the horse's fast speed.

"Sophie, quit staring off!" Aruro yelled back to me, causing me to snap my attention forward dizzily. "You'll lose speed if you don't focus straight ahead."

"It's behind us Corporal Levi. We should switch to 3D Maneuvering Gear!"

I heard this many times. I stressed with them, not able to look back as they were. I didn't speak a word about switching like everyone else had- I wasn't nearly as good as that, than I was at riding a horse. Free was fast, just like that rest of these horses, was this aberrant really going to catch up to us-?

That's when I saw the fright written on my comrades' faces. Even the titan, Eren had a look in his blue-green eyes that I would never forget. "Eren DON'T!"

They were telling him not to bite himself. I could only imagine what that would do, but they acted like it was terrible thing. How he turned into a titan- that was my guess, from their reactions.

They yelled, fought with each other- and we all rode, our lives on the line as the pounding steps came at us faster. To my relief, Eren did not transform, and even if it put my life in further risk I kept a distance from him as I rode.

It was about to get us. I knew this from the insane rumble that basically broke that ground under us, shaking the horses off track in some spots right off their nimble hooved footing. We were goners. Everyone was thinking that as we passed into a clearing, further diminishing our hopes of living.

That's when we heard it. The explosions and shooting from behind us sounded an instant after we passed through the forest trees. I finally snuck a look back, and in horror I realized what was chasing us. The titan- a woman, he body muscular without skin and her eyes a bright blue while her hair was blond.

Her appearance made me sick, and I threw up when Free came to a trot away from the others. Why was I so repulsed? I could only picture Mina, and I glared in Eren's direction as he caught my stare.

I don't know what reaction I gained from him, for I took my eyes away to throw up once more. The bread I had eaten before this trip was lost from my gut and I felt entirely empty and tired.

"Are you all right kid?" A man with dark hair- from Levi's squad asked as he rode next to me. I jumped off my horse and held the reigns, using the sleeve of my jacket to wipe my mouth.

"Yes." I replied sourly.

I pulled Free toward the other horses, who, like Free, were breathing hard from their intense run.

The female titan was tacked down by several hundred cables and nails. She looked like an art project, but she was still frightening to me. Whatever had gone on seemed to all end up how it was supposed to, but that didn't justify all that casualties in the long run. My commander, and the corporal- they knew something. They were behind this all, weren't they? Was every one siding with titans these days? Were we going through all this trouble so that we could have yet another monster on our side? I looked up at a tree, where on the branch stood Levi and Irvin who looked like they were about to move away from the scene, and decided to follow them.

I didn't know proper etiquette when it came to dealing with superiors, and I hoped that they didn't expect that of me when I approached them. I wanted to ask so badly what was going on. Why they had me here when all I wanted to do was be a doctor, safe in the walls. Maybe I was going to unjustly take out my anger on them, maybe they deserved it. I knew this was all a part of the plan, but being dragged around like this- I have had enough of it.

* * *

I have no time to proof read, I'm sorry for such a terrible chapter I know that I need to get more there! I have to work in the morning oh and btw I have an account on Deviant art if you want to visit with me ^^ Not really that much to do with my stories, but it's all for fun, so, you know.

DA account: KumoriOokamiSan

If you want me to look at your art I would be simply delighted- this is my new favorite thing, so I'd thought maybe some of you guys might be interested too! If you don't have one and you are an art-sy person than I think you should check this place out, it's pretty popular.


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